2023-01-05 21:12![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
wildlionchef in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
the_zone
wildlionchef in the_zoneWho: Tachibana and Akutsu
When: January 5
Where: Akutsu’s room
What: Another talk, but progress this time?
Tachibana knew he was being immature and silly about this whole thing. He had told Akutsu he wasn’t going to rush him for answers, and here he was, getting stupidly frustrated and actually telling Akutsu as such. He was quite embarrassed with himself. Still, if Akutsu was willing to talk, he was willing to talk as well, and so here he was, knocking on Akutsu’s door again for another awkward talk.
Akutsu sighed a little to himself. He and Tachi really needed to quit meeting like this, for all those awkward conversations. Seemed like way too many of those kinds of things, and not nearly enough of the more comfortable, familiar kind. But…with any luck, this was going to be the last of the awkwardness. When Tachibana knocked, he got up from his desk and opened the door. ""Hey, you," he smiled a little, tugging Tachi inside.
Tachibana let himself be pulled in, immediately disarmed by Akutsu’s smile. “Hey…” He smiled back nervously. He stood there for a moment, waiting for Akutsu’s lead. They would probably sit down, but he didn’t want to assume. “Sorry for having to meet like this again…”
Akutsu chuckled and pulled Tachibana into a hug. "Don't apologize like ya did somethin wrong. I ain't the best at makin' my thoughts or feelings known, so it's kinda normal, sadly." He'd taken like two weeks to write a one page letter for Niou, after all, and they'd been boyfriends for months. He loosened his hold on Tachi, but kept one arm around his shoulders and guided him to one of the beds to sit.
“I kind of envy that, sometimes…” Tachibana admitted. Being an open book was sometimes very hard on him. He followed Akutsu’s lead and sat down on the bed. “I’m worried this is me rushing you to an answer, and I’m not meaning to do that…”
Akutsu shook his head and gently squeezed Tachibana with the arm on his shoulders. "Don't envy it. Makes things hard, bein with people who wanna actually hear the stuff I think often but say rarely. Bein a physical kinda person only works if the ones you're with can translate." He sighed a little and leaned his head against Tachi's. "You're not rushin me. It's been a while and I ain't cleared up anything for ya, yet. It's normal to want answers."
Tachibana let himself relax a little. “I do know that you care about me. I know you don’t just sit with people like this on the regular.” He wanted Akutsu to know that he at least understood a little. “I guess I just…sometimes want to be the one being held, and I thought about it with Masaharu, and…I guess I like what we have… I still want it, but I…kinda want it with you more…” He knew Akutsu wouldn’t misunderstand his implication there. That just because he wanted that with Akutsu didn’t mean he loved him more than Niou. He would have to find a more delicate way to talk to Niou about it.
"I get it. Just like Masaharu wantin both of us, but what he gets from you is different from what he gets from me. Same's true for us." In this trio that was forming, there weren't any pairs that had stronger feelings than any other. It was simply different, that's all. Akutsu sighed a little, taking a moment to try and put his thoughts into words he could actually get out. "I really do care about you, Kippei. A lot. Honestly…I never used to understand how people could do it. Have multiple partners, I mean. But…I do now. Ain't somethin I could easily explain to anyone else, but… You and Masaharu both…are so insanely important to me…"
Tachibana hated how shaky his breathing was when he took a deep breath. “I care about you, too. I would never have been okay with what we have with Masaharu if it had been anyone else. You never made me feel like I had to compete…and I guess I started falling for you because of that. I feel safe with you.”
A few things ran through Akutsu's mind, like how he was pretty sure he couldn't have shared Niou with anyone else, either, and why should either of them have to compete when they were completely different people... but between the shaking and that last bit, the I feel safe with you, everything else pretty much went out the window. So instead of saying anything, he sat back up and gently turned Tachibana's face towards him, then leaned in and softly kissed him.
Tachibana wasn’t quite expecting that, but he didn’t push away. He closed his eyes and kissed back, hands searching for Akutsu’s hands to hold. Kissing Akutsu was definitely not the same as kissing Masaharu….but it was just as good. He took in all the sensations as they kissed and it occurred to him just how much he liked the smell of Akutsu’s hair. When they parted, he couldn’t help but smile. “What was that for?”
Akutsu blinked a little, but smiled back. "Just felt like it," he answered with a shrug. He didn't really know how to tell Tachibana that he liked making people feel safe, liked being a kind of protector. Even though he knew Tachibana could handle himself and didn't need protecting...Or was that a part of it, too? "You didn't punch me for it, though, so...that's a good thing..."
Tachibana laughed. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while, so why would I punch you for it?” He shook his head in amusement. “You aren’t too bad at it.” He said with a smirk. “I can see why Masaharu likes kissing you so much.”
"...aren't too bad at it..." Akutsu grumbled, rolling his eyes playfully at the teasing and gently pinching the skin at one of Tachibana's wrists as punishment. "If ya wanted to do it for so long...what stopped ya?"
“Ow.” Tachibana pouted. He rubbed his wrist and gave Akutsu a sheepish smile. “I wanted to make sure you wanted it, too.” He gave a small shrug. “I mean, I wasn’t even sure if you were physically attracted to me. I’m kinda…really different from Masaharu, physically.”
Akutsu couldn't help a little chuckle at the pout. There Tachi went, being cute again. "Oh, I've noticed," he teased back, intentionally being obvious about it as he looked Tachibana over. "But yanno...I'm learnin that physically speakin', I got a type, but only when ignorin personality. The ones that're good for a fuck but not much else. But throw personality in the mix..." He took Tachibana's hands in his properly, giving them a squeeze. "I ain't gonna lie. When we first met, if someone'd asked me if I thought you were good lookin, I probably woulda shrugged it off and not given a real answer. But now...I know you. An' if someone asked me now, I'd tell 'em you're handsome, sometimes cute, and occasionally downright adorable." And that didn't include the times he'd caught himself checking out Tachibana's ass.
Tachibana groaned, but it was more good-natured than actually exasperated. “I think this is the first time in my life that someone has called me adorable.” He laughed softly. “I thought you were very…unapproachable at first. I quickly changed my mind on that, though. Even more so once we really got to know each other.” He squeezed Akutsu’s hands back. “Always did think you were handsome, though…”
Akutsu laughed too. "Definitely adorable. Especially with flour all over ya," he smirked, thinking back to the pancake lessons. That had actually been so much fun, to his own surprise. He'd even included the tale in one of his letters home. "The unapproachable thing…I do it on purpose," he admitted with a shrug. "At least, I used to. Haven't really been botherin' much, lately."
Tachibana blushed. “You really did seem to like making a mess of me.” He teased. He had figured that Akutsu did keep people at arm’s length on purpose. He was a man that had lived a hard life, after all. “I have to admit, I do like this side of you. The real you. Even if you do like teasing me.”
Akutsu actually bit back the comment about other ways he could make a mess of Tachibana. For now. "It's all the real me, yanno. Just…different parts. Layered like an onion or some shit like that." Of course, he knew Tachi meant the more mellow, relaxed, not on the defensive side of him. "Especially the teasing part," he smirked, "so don't think that's goin anywhere."
“I see. You’re definitely handsomer than Shrek.” Tachibana said. Curse his sister for making him watch those stupid movies. He sighed with a laugh at that last bit. “I figured that was the case. I…don’t actually mind it that much. I figured it’s the way you show your affection.” He bumped his shoulder to Akutsu’s, feeling nice and relaxed. “Even if it does make me blush like an idiot sometimes.”
"Yeah…that, and physically. Not just sex but…touches in general." He bumped Tachibana's shoulder in return, then let himself lean on him a little. "And time. Spendin time with people… just…almost everything but actually talkin 'bout it," Akutsu chuckled wryly. ".....what the fuck is a Shrek?"
“Talking is overrated sometimes.” Tachibana said, enjoying being close to Akutsu. “Ah, Shrek was an ogre from some old movies my sister made me watch. He said ogres were like onions, with many layers. You made me think of that.” He laughed. “They were weird movies.”
"And other times it's necessary," Akutsu sighed, mildly annoyed by it. But at least this was, hopefully, going to be the last necessary awkward conversation they'd have to have…and then he could go back to not talking about stuff like this. "...So…I'm more attractive than an ogre. Thanks, Kips. Way to boost a guy's ego," he teased.
Tachibana nodded. “Yes. But I really hope this is the last time it has to be so…weird.” He couldn’t help but laugh at that last bit. “Hey, some really weird people were really into that ogre back in the day.” Which weirded Tachibana out, really. “I think the next time I’m feeling off, we’ll just skip the talking and do the hand-holding and kissing. I like it more, and it does the job of making me feel better.”
Akutsu chuckled, and decided to just…leave the whole ogre thing alone. It was even weirder than their conversation, and that kinda said something all on its own. "As long as it's somethin we can skip talkin' about, sure. Whatever helps." He was quiet for a moment, before adding, "so. Which one of us has to tell Masaharu about this?"
“...I’ll do it this time.” Tachibana volunteered. “He already admitted he sometimes has dreams where he’s mean to me, so maybe that means he is already annoyed with me?” Tachibana laughed. It was probably just him being paranoid. “I’ll tell him we kissed, too, so he doesn’t stress and think we did anything else…”
Akutsu blinked, arching an eyebrow at Tachi. "If he's already annoyed with ya…you sure it's a good idea for you to be the one to tell him we're datin now?" Even if it was just Tachibana being paranoid… "We should definitely tell him 'bout the kiss, though…" Especially since it kind of meant that 'anything else' wasn't impossible.
“It’ll be okay.” Tachibana reassured. He looked at his communicator for a second. “I want to tell him. I feel like it needs to come from me.” He gave Akutsu a smile. “Don’t worry about it, okay?”
"Hmm…" Akutsu slid an arm around Tachibana's waist. "At least lemme know how it goes. Cuz I'm gonna worry about it til then." There'd been joking about the possibility of this, and there'd been Niou's fears that Akutsu and Tachi would hook up and leave him behind…and now that it was actually kind of happening…it was anybody's guess how Niou would react. He'd seemed to be over his fears lately but… "I mean it. Lemme know how he takes it. 'Kay?"
God, why did having Jin’s arm around his waist like this feel so right? The only thing that would make it better was having Masaharu in his lap while it was happening. “I’ll let you know. I think he’s already feeling a little left out, so I’m going to go to him after this…”
Akutsu nodded. It was probably a good idea, as much as a part of him wanted to keep Tachibana here for a while. "I told him earlier you and I were gonna hang out, just us…and he did seem kinda dejected about it. He was all 'gosh I hope I don't have nightmares', and I told him he could still come over if that happened…" Akutsu honestly doubted he and Tachi would spend that long talking, but even if they did, he'd meant it. He'd never turn Niou away if he was having nightmares. "Of course, then he got paranoid he'd walk in on us 'tangled up and naked'. His words."
Tachibana sighed softly. “We’re not there yet.” And then he groaned. “The yet probably stresses him out, too.” He looked at Jin. “We probably are a long way away from even being able to spend more than an hour together without him worrying. Is that okay?”
Akutsu chuckled, squeezing Tachibana a little. "He's always anxious about things he doesn't need to be." He thought about it a bit, debating the idea that they didn't always have to tell Niou when they were together, especially if Niou was already busy doing something else - like his visits with Yagyuu - but the more he thought about it, the more he thought not telling Niou was probably worse than complete transparency about it. "It's fine. We'll take the time we can get, and we'll make a point of spendin some time for all of us together, so he can both know we're not leavin him out and see us for himself, to get used to the idea…"
Tachibana laid his head on Akutsu’s shoulder. “Yeah, that’s a good plan. I think if we are anything less than completely transparent, he’ll worry even more. And hopefully, he’ll get used to the idea when he realizes we enjoy him being there as well.” He smiled gently. “Like…it would be so nice to have him cuddled up with us here now…”
"...We could ask him to join us, you know. Tell him together?" Akutsu suggested, leaning his cheek against the top of Tachibana's head. Or they could enjoy this time just the two of them for a while longer… Either one was fine.
“No, I’m already mentally ready to do it on my own.” Tachibana said softly. “Let’s just sit like this a little longer first, okay?”
Akutsu nodded and used his arm around Tachibana to gently tug him a little closer. "Alright. As long as you want, Kippei."
Tachibana smiled and just relaxed in Akutsu’s arms. There was still a long way to go before this was normal, but he hoped the three of them could settle into something normal for them soon. For now, he was happy to have these little moments with Akutsu, and was sure he would have many more moments with both of his boyfriends sooner rather than later.
When: January 5
Where: Akutsu’s room
What: Another talk, but progress this time?
Tachibana knew he was being immature and silly about this whole thing. He had told Akutsu he wasn’t going to rush him for answers, and here he was, getting stupidly frustrated and actually telling Akutsu as such. He was quite embarrassed with himself. Still, if Akutsu was willing to talk, he was willing to talk as well, and so here he was, knocking on Akutsu’s door again for another awkward talk.
Akutsu sighed a little to himself. He and Tachi really needed to quit meeting like this, for all those awkward conversations. Seemed like way too many of those kinds of things, and not nearly enough of the more comfortable, familiar kind. But…with any luck, this was going to be the last of the awkwardness. When Tachibana knocked, he got up from his desk and opened the door. ""Hey, you," he smiled a little, tugging Tachi inside.
Tachibana let himself be pulled in, immediately disarmed by Akutsu’s smile. “Hey…” He smiled back nervously. He stood there for a moment, waiting for Akutsu’s lead. They would probably sit down, but he didn’t want to assume. “Sorry for having to meet like this again…”
Akutsu chuckled and pulled Tachibana into a hug. "Don't apologize like ya did somethin wrong. I ain't the best at makin' my thoughts or feelings known, so it's kinda normal, sadly." He'd taken like two weeks to write a one page letter for Niou, after all, and they'd been boyfriends for months. He loosened his hold on Tachi, but kept one arm around his shoulders and guided him to one of the beds to sit.
“I kind of envy that, sometimes…” Tachibana admitted. Being an open book was sometimes very hard on him. He followed Akutsu’s lead and sat down on the bed. “I’m worried this is me rushing you to an answer, and I’m not meaning to do that…”
Akutsu shook his head and gently squeezed Tachibana with the arm on his shoulders. "Don't envy it. Makes things hard, bein with people who wanna actually hear the stuff I think often but say rarely. Bein a physical kinda person only works if the ones you're with can translate." He sighed a little and leaned his head against Tachi's. "You're not rushin me. It's been a while and I ain't cleared up anything for ya, yet. It's normal to want answers."
Tachibana let himself relax a little. “I do know that you care about me. I know you don’t just sit with people like this on the regular.” He wanted Akutsu to know that he at least understood a little. “I guess I just…sometimes want to be the one being held, and I thought about it with Masaharu, and…I guess I like what we have… I still want it, but I…kinda want it with you more…” He knew Akutsu wouldn’t misunderstand his implication there. That just because he wanted that with Akutsu didn’t mean he loved him more than Niou. He would have to find a more delicate way to talk to Niou about it.
"I get it. Just like Masaharu wantin both of us, but what he gets from you is different from what he gets from me. Same's true for us." In this trio that was forming, there weren't any pairs that had stronger feelings than any other. It was simply different, that's all. Akutsu sighed a little, taking a moment to try and put his thoughts into words he could actually get out. "I really do care about you, Kippei. A lot. Honestly…I never used to understand how people could do it. Have multiple partners, I mean. But…I do now. Ain't somethin I could easily explain to anyone else, but… You and Masaharu both…are so insanely important to me…"
Tachibana hated how shaky his breathing was when he took a deep breath. “I care about you, too. I would never have been okay with what we have with Masaharu if it had been anyone else. You never made me feel like I had to compete…and I guess I started falling for you because of that. I feel safe with you.”
A few things ran through Akutsu's mind, like how he was pretty sure he couldn't have shared Niou with anyone else, either, and why should either of them have to compete when they were completely different people... but between the shaking and that last bit, the I feel safe with you, everything else pretty much went out the window. So instead of saying anything, he sat back up and gently turned Tachibana's face towards him, then leaned in and softly kissed him.
Tachibana wasn’t quite expecting that, but he didn’t push away. He closed his eyes and kissed back, hands searching for Akutsu’s hands to hold. Kissing Akutsu was definitely not the same as kissing Masaharu….but it was just as good. He took in all the sensations as they kissed and it occurred to him just how much he liked the smell of Akutsu’s hair. When they parted, he couldn’t help but smile. “What was that for?”
Akutsu blinked a little, but smiled back. "Just felt like it," he answered with a shrug. He didn't really know how to tell Tachibana that he liked making people feel safe, liked being a kind of protector. Even though he knew Tachibana could handle himself and didn't need protecting...Or was that a part of it, too? "You didn't punch me for it, though, so...that's a good thing..."
Tachibana laughed. “I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a while, so why would I punch you for it?” He shook his head in amusement. “You aren’t too bad at it.” He said with a smirk. “I can see why Masaharu likes kissing you so much.”
"...aren't too bad at it..." Akutsu grumbled, rolling his eyes playfully at the teasing and gently pinching the skin at one of Tachibana's wrists as punishment. "If ya wanted to do it for so long...what stopped ya?"
“Ow.” Tachibana pouted. He rubbed his wrist and gave Akutsu a sheepish smile. “I wanted to make sure you wanted it, too.” He gave a small shrug. “I mean, I wasn’t even sure if you were physically attracted to me. I’m kinda…really different from Masaharu, physically.”
Akutsu couldn't help a little chuckle at the pout. There Tachi went, being cute again. "Oh, I've noticed," he teased back, intentionally being obvious about it as he looked Tachibana over. "But yanno...I'm learnin that physically speakin', I got a type, but only when ignorin personality. The ones that're good for a fuck but not much else. But throw personality in the mix..." He took Tachibana's hands in his properly, giving them a squeeze. "I ain't gonna lie. When we first met, if someone'd asked me if I thought you were good lookin, I probably woulda shrugged it off and not given a real answer. But now...I know you. An' if someone asked me now, I'd tell 'em you're handsome, sometimes cute, and occasionally downright adorable." And that didn't include the times he'd caught himself checking out Tachibana's ass.
Tachibana groaned, but it was more good-natured than actually exasperated. “I think this is the first time in my life that someone has called me adorable.” He laughed softly. “I thought you were very…unapproachable at first. I quickly changed my mind on that, though. Even more so once we really got to know each other.” He squeezed Akutsu’s hands back. “Always did think you were handsome, though…”
Akutsu laughed too. "Definitely adorable. Especially with flour all over ya," he smirked, thinking back to the pancake lessons. That had actually been so much fun, to his own surprise. He'd even included the tale in one of his letters home. "The unapproachable thing…I do it on purpose," he admitted with a shrug. "At least, I used to. Haven't really been botherin' much, lately."
Tachibana blushed. “You really did seem to like making a mess of me.” He teased. He had figured that Akutsu did keep people at arm’s length on purpose. He was a man that had lived a hard life, after all. “I have to admit, I do like this side of you. The real you. Even if you do like teasing me.”
Akutsu actually bit back the comment about other ways he could make a mess of Tachibana. For now. "It's all the real me, yanno. Just…different parts. Layered like an onion or some shit like that." Of course, he knew Tachi meant the more mellow, relaxed, not on the defensive side of him. "Especially the teasing part," he smirked, "so don't think that's goin anywhere."
“I see. You’re definitely handsomer than Shrek.” Tachibana said. Curse his sister for making him watch those stupid movies. He sighed with a laugh at that last bit. “I figured that was the case. I…don’t actually mind it that much. I figured it’s the way you show your affection.” He bumped his shoulder to Akutsu’s, feeling nice and relaxed. “Even if it does make me blush like an idiot sometimes.”
"Yeah…that, and physically. Not just sex but…touches in general." He bumped Tachibana's shoulder in return, then let himself lean on him a little. "And time. Spendin time with people… just…almost everything but actually talkin 'bout it," Akutsu chuckled wryly. ".....what the fuck is a Shrek?"
“Talking is overrated sometimes.” Tachibana said, enjoying being close to Akutsu. “Ah, Shrek was an ogre from some old movies my sister made me watch. He said ogres were like onions, with many layers. You made me think of that.” He laughed. “They were weird movies.”
"And other times it's necessary," Akutsu sighed, mildly annoyed by it. But at least this was, hopefully, going to be the last necessary awkward conversation they'd have to have…and then he could go back to not talking about stuff like this. "...So…I'm more attractive than an ogre. Thanks, Kips. Way to boost a guy's ego," he teased.
Tachibana nodded. “Yes. But I really hope this is the last time it has to be so…weird.” He couldn’t help but laugh at that last bit. “Hey, some really weird people were really into that ogre back in the day.” Which weirded Tachibana out, really. “I think the next time I’m feeling off, we’ll just skip the talking and do the hand-holding and kissing. I like it more, and it does the job of making me feel better.”
Akutsu chuckled, and decided to just…leave the whole ogre thing alone. It was even weirder than their conversation, and that kinda said something all on its own. "As long as it's somethin we can skip talkin' about, sure. Whatever helps." He was quiet for a moment, before adding, "so. Which one of us has to tell Masaharu about this?"
“...I’ll do it this time.” Tachibana volunteered. “He already admitted he sometimes has dreams where he’s mean to me, so maybe that means he is already annoyed with me?” Tachibana laughed. It was probably just him being paranoid. “I’ll tell him we kissed, too, so he doesn’t stress and think we did anything else…”
Akutsu blinked, arching an eyebrow at Tachi. "If he's already annoyed with ya…you sure it's a good idea for you to be the one to tell him we're datin now?" Even if it was just Tachibana being paranoid… "We should definitely tell him 'bout the kiss, though…" Especially since it kind of meant that 'anything else' wasn't impossible.
“It’ll be okay.” Tachibana reassured. He looked at his communicator for a second. “I want to tell him. I feel like it needs to come from me.” He gave Akutsu a smile. “Don’t worry about it, okay?”
"Hmm…" Akutsu slid an arm around Tachibana's waist. "At least lemme know how it goes. Cuz I'm gonna worry about it til then." There'd been joking about the possibility of this, and there'd been Niou's fears that Akutsu and Tachi would hook up and leave him behind…and now that it was actually kind of happening…it was anybody's guess how Niou would react. He'd seemed to be over his fears lately but… "I mean it. Lemme know how he takes it. 'Kay?"
God, why did having Jin’s arm around his waist like this feel so right? The only thing that would make it better was having Masaharu in his lap while it was happening. “I’ll let you know. I think he’s already feeling a little left out, so I’m going to go to him after this…”
Akutsu nodded. It was probably a good idea, as much as a part of him wanted to keep Tachibana here for a while. "I told him earlier you and I were gonna hang out, just us…and he did seem kinda dejected about it. He was all 'gosh I hope I don't have nightmares', and I told him he could still come over if that happened…" Akutsu honestly doubted he and Tachi would spend that long talking, but even if they did, he'd meant it. He'd never turn Niou away if he was having nightmares. "Of course, then he got paranoid he'd walk in on us 'tangled up and naked'. His words."
Tachibana sighed softly. “We’re not there yet.” And then he groaned. “The yet probably stresses him out, too.” He looked at Jin. “We probably are a long way away from even being able to spend more than an hour together without him worrying. Is that okay?”
Akutsu chuckled, squeezing Tachibana a little. "He's always anxious about things he doesn't need to be." He thought about it a bit, debating the idea that they didn't always have to tell Niou when they were together, especially if Niou was already busy doing something else - like his visits with Yagyuu - but the more he thought about it, the more he thought not telling Niou was probably worse than complete transparency about it. "It's fine. We'll take the time we can get, and we'll make a point of spendin some time for all of us together, so he can both know we're not leavin him out and see us for himself, to get used to the idea…"
Tachibana laid his head on Akutsu’s shoulder. “Yeah, that’s a good plan. I think if we are anything less than completely transparent, he’ll worry even more. And hopefully, he’ll get used to the idea when he realizes we enjoy him being there as well.” He smiled gently. “Like…it would be so nice to have him cuddled up with us here now…”
"...We could ask him to join us, you know. Tell him together?" Akutsu suggested, leaning his cheek against the top of Tachibana's head. Or they could enjoy this time just the two of them for a while longer… Either one was fine.
“No, I’m already mentally ready to do it on my own.” Tachibana said softly. “Let’s just sit like this a little longer first, okay?”
Akutsu nodded and used his arm around Tachibana to gently tug him a little closer. "Alright. As long as you want, Kippei."
Tachibana smiled and just relaxed in Akutsu’s arms. There was still a long way to go before this was normal, but he hoped the three of them could settle into something normal for them soon. For now, he was happy to have these little moments with Akutsu, and was sure he would have many more moments with both of his boyfriends sooner rather than later.
